Vampire Owl: I have some problems with these dead men.
Vampire Bat: I am pretty sure that you don’t even know them.
Vampire Owl: Maybe, but I don’t understand why they come to the conclusion that dead men tell no tales.
Vampire Bat: It is quite a common saying in the human world, as I have heard.
Vampire Owl: But we are dead, and we tell stories.
Vampire Bat: We are the undead. It is a different case. Even in the movie, the undead exist.
Vampire Owl: I am sure that they can tell a few tales too.
Vampire Bat: Do you prefer the subtitle to be Salazar’s Revenge?
Vampire Owl: Revenge is so common, so dull. It is not that sweet as it used to be. I would prefer to wait and achieve greatness, which would be my revenge, which is not really the direct revenge.
Vampire Bat: Let them keep the dead men and their tales then.
[Gets the tickets with cardamom tea and french fries].
What is the movie about? :: Henry Turner (Brenton Thwaites), the son of Will Turner (Orlando Bloom) and Elizabeth Swann (Keira Knightley) works on a warship belonging to the Royal British Navy which has been after the pirates who have been plaguing the ocean around the Americas. It is an eventful journey, with pirates being around now and then. During one of such journeys, when they are chasing a pirate ship, they go right into the Devil’s Triangle, known more to the modern world as the Bermuda Triangle. Henry tries to prevent the same, but rising against the captain’s order makes his talks and action something resembling mutiny, and he is imprisoned in a cage. But it is not the pirate ship that they found inside, but something resembling a wrecked ship, and the undead in the form of sailors led by a man known as Captain Salazar (Javier Bardem) attacks them, and kills everyone except Henry who is asked to deliver a message to Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp), about death coming after him.
So, what happens next? :: Meanwhile, Jack is trying to rob a newly opened bank with his pirate gang, but in the end, they lose all the money, and he is left behind in the process. Henry who survives the attack of the undead pirates after being left behind by Salazar, is captured by the British, and branding him as a coward and a traitor, they plan to execute him. It is during that time that he comes across a young woman named Carina Smyth (Kaya Scodelario) who was sentenced to death for witchcraft, but had escaped at the same time when Jack was going through his robbery. She is also captured while trying to contact Henry, but he escapes when the attention is on her. The curious Carina also intends to go to find the Trident of Poseidon which Henry has been looking for, as it is supposed to have the power to free his father from the curse. Jack, who is left with nothing in the sea, also gets caught after drinking too much. The British decides to execute the witch and the pirate at the same location, at the same time, by hanging and by the guillotine.
And, what is to follow next in the seas? :: With the help of Jack’s former crew, Henry manages to help both Jack and Carina escape, and they get back to the sea in search of the trident on Jack’s small ship, Dying Gull. Carina has the map that would lead them to the same, which only she can read with her skills. With Salazar and his undead crew managing to escape from their dark captivity, and the undead captain assigning the grand pirate Captain Hector Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush) with the duty of finding Jack after some threatening, Jack and his new friends have more than one trident to look out for. Salazar’s main objective is to kill Jack, but he wouldn’t hesitate to kill or destroy anyone or anything that he finds on his way, and with the Royal Navy as well as Barbossa being no match to him and his army of undead, how would Jack, Carina and Henry manage to escape from the clutches of the evil which is ready to be unleashed all around the waters?
The defence of Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales :: There is entertainment in store in Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales, that is for sure, and we have the same with the support of some nice visuals, and the 3D is pretty much okay. The undead sailors and sharks are all nice, and the locations contribute to the same so well. The comic side is at its best with the scenes of execution of two protagonists, a big bank robbery scene and the jokes regarding the job description of the heroine – other than that, there are a few working here and there, fine enough to keep the ship floating. Johnny Depp still has a lot of the sparrow in him with nothing much changing about the character we have loved for so long, and Kaya Scodelario is a lot welcome addition to the same, coming right out of The Maze Runner and its sequel, The Scorch Trials. Javier Bardem and Brenton Thwaites also becomes fine additions to this adventure, and they all contribute to making this movie good, even though it is still the least interesting movie among all the five flicks that make this franchise.
The claws of flaw :: The fans of the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise might have surely expected something bigger with Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales, and it would leave them thinking why this one hasn’t evolved even after such a long gap with no pirates in the seas. There could have been more magnificence with the horror here, and something even bigger to end the movie with. The forced cameos bring no surprise and it can be said all the time. We wanted more of everything considering how long it took to come up with this sequel. Here is even Jack Sparrow not becoming the one whom we had waited for so long – the comic side is good, but we end up thinking if the character itself was needed, or some other pirate could have been enough. A stronger tale could have also helped, because this one seems to be a story written just to bring this movie to light, and get more money at the box-office in the name of the brand – the effect of having the pirates is coming down, and the makers have to be careful, for this is not even an animated movie like the Ice Age movie series.
How it finishes :: Even with some fun in store, one has to think that Disney is using the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise too much in the same way, trying to make more and more money out of the same. It has been fourteen long years since Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl released, and it has been six years since the last movie of the franchise, Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides released – there are two sides to the same, for most people should have forgotten how things have been going on in this movie, and there is also a lot of people who have wished to see something or anything related to the pirates on the big screen. If more of the same thing is needed to be repeated, this is the movie that you should go for, as nothing new or special makes its way into this movie. You can watch this one to have more of pirates, but you can’t expect it to bring anything new – for experimentation seems to have left this franchise with ease, and being more creative is no longer the visible option for the makers.
Release date: 26th May 2017
Running time: 128 minutes
Directed by: Joachim Ronning, Espen Sandberg
Starring: Johnny Depp, Kaya Scodelario, Javier Bardem, Brenton Thwaites, Kevin McNally, Geoffrey Rush, Martin Klebba, Orlando Bloom (cameo), Keira Knightley (cameo)
@ Cemetery Watch
✠ The Vampire Bat.