Amanda Lund – Movies of the Soul

Vampire Owl: Have you ever met the Vampire Stork?

Vampire Bat: What? There is no such thing as a Vampire Stork. It is not natural.

Vampire Owl: Well, a Vampire Panda is not natural, but we have one.

Vampire Bat: But we know that it is Kung Fu Panda in disguise.

Vampire Owl: Still, the Vampire Stork became a strange reality near Bermuda Triangle.

Vampire Bat: In that case, it could possibly be a Zombie Stork.

Vampire Owl: Well, the investigation teams are on their way.

Vampire Bat: What if the stork is to deliver a baby instead?

Vampire Owl: Storks don’t deliver babies!

Vampire Bat: Just watch the movie and find out!

[Gets three cups of lemon tea with 50-50 biscuits].

What is the movie about? :: It was quite natural for the storks of Stork Mountain to deliver babies to the families all around the world, and each one of them found extreme happiness in doing the same. They had delivered millions of babies to people until one stork named Jasper (Danny Trejo) attempted to keep a little baby girl for himself one day, which changed it all. The tracker which provided the location of the family to which the baby was to be delivered is lost, and Jasper goes away from there in shame and disgust. With no option left, the storks adopt the baby, and name the new orphan as Tulip (Katie Crown) who grows up within the company. The CEO of the company, Hunter (Kelsey Grammer) discontinued all baby delivery after that and replaced the same with package delivery going by the name Cornerstore.com. After doing the same, he has been focusing on the stocks only, and by being mean to everyone, made the firm a succesful company based on exploitation of its work force.

So, what happens next in the movie? :: Eighteen years after she was adopted, Tulip who is an adult now, is working with Cornerstore, and regularly messes up things. Hunter is not happy that Tulip keeps bringing the stocks down with whatever she s doing at the factory. As Hunter is the typical boss who doesn’t want to deal with the emotional side looking only for profits, he just wants to fire Tulip, and he assigns the task to Junior (Andy Samberg) who is to take his place after he becomes the chairman. Junior can’t get himself to fire the girl, and so he transfers her to the mail room which doesn’t really get any mail these days. While she spends all her time there alone, Junior hopes that he can finally get the promotion and be the boss to be in control of the operations.

And, what is to follow next in the animated adventure? :: At the same time, Nate Gardner (Anton Starkman) is a lone boy who is in need of some attention as his parents Henry Gardner (Ty Burrell) and Sarah Gardner (Jennifer Aniston) are always working, not even trying to spare five or ten minutes with their child. He sends a letter to the storks, hoping that he could get a baby brother to play with. This letter which reaches Cornerstone, has Tulip’s attention as she has the first letter in a long time. She immediately enters the baby factory and use the letter to make the baby-making machine work. The result is a pink-haired baby girl. Junior arrives at the machine to try and shut down the machine, and injures his wings. With him unable to fly after the injury to his wings, the two uses Tulip’s flying machine which she had invented to work while delivering for Cornerstone, and plans to get the baby home before anyone else finds out. But can they successfully do that?

The defence of Storks :: This movie might be the cutest that any animated flick can get, with babies as the centre of attraction. The kids are going to love this movie like no other, as the cuteness factor is at its best beginning from the birth of the first baby itself – then there are a lot of babies coming together in the end, and it is the explosion of cuteness on the screen, like happiness was for Trolls. Then the movie gets to another sweet level, and with its short run-time, never get go of that quality. Along with the same, there is a lot of fun in store here, along with the emotional side which tells us how important family is – spending time with children is that significant. The movie also talks about that cruel mindset of the corporate world, which is clearly against anything human or close to life. The profit-oriented society is killing so many families with all the focus on money-making, right? Well, loving humans is not that easy as loving money, isn’t it?

The claws of flaw :: One has to feel that Storks did rush through the proceedings, and everything happens rather too fast. We could have slowly and smoothly moved through all those sweet, cute moments, but this one was surely in a hurry – we also wanted to see more of the wolves and penguins in this flick; maybe there can be spin-offs. The basic idea about the storks might also be a little outdated, and the myth might also go over the head of more than one person or two. There is also the chance the main characters might feel irritating at times. One also wonders how cute the babies can remain, as the teenage fury seems to come and affect everyone a little too early these days; the age out of cuteness beginning too early too be exact, as we see in that Carnival Cinemas advertisement. We are also tend to wonder if this could have been even better on the lines of Moana, Zootopia, Frozen, Inside Out, Big Hero 6, Epic, Kung Fu Panda, How to Train Your Dragon, or such kind, with an even better story.

How it finishes :: Nicholas Stoller had directed a movie which is often considered among the worst movies which were appreciated by the US critics, The Neighbors, but Storks is that kind of a movie from him and Doug Sweetland that everybody will love to keep falling in love with, again and again. Well, have you seen this kind of cuteness for a long time? The animated movies usually take themselves as cute, and don’t include any extra cuteness, but not with Storks, which adds the cuteness as the secret, special ingredient. When this cuteness is guaranteed with entertainment, it is nothing less than a crime not to get your little ones here. A colourful movie is what is needed to get some colour into your life, and Storks might be the perfect flick to do that – you will love babies more for sure, after watching Storks. I have myself found myself more cuteness and love after this one.

Release date: 23rd September 2016
Running time: 87 minutes
Directed by: Nicholas Stoller, Doug Sweetland
Starring: Andy Samberg, Katie Crown, Kelsey Grammer, Jennifer Aniston, Ty Burrell, Keegan-Michael Key, Jordan Peele, Danny Trejo, Chris Smith, Awkwafina, Ike Barinholtz, Amanda Lund, Jorma Taccone

@ Cemetery Watch
✠ The Vampire Bat.

Vampire Owl: Movie adaptation of children’s horror fiction? What is this? We are the ones who are supposed to scare the children, not some random novels.

Vampire Bat: Not everywhere. There are regional people of darkness who have acquired the opportunity; for example, the rights for the same in Kerala were bought by Sir Kokachi.

Vampire Owl: But I wish to scare kids! I really want to really frighten them! It is my special skill!

Vampire Bat: Well, with Hotel Transylvania’s second part around, may be we will have to retire after all. I hope that this movie can support our cause.

[Gets the tickets with some cheese popcorn].

✠ This was recently posted by me at Kiagia.com: http://www.kiagia.com/index.php/current-film-releases-movie/1146-goosebumps-movie-review

Goosebumps is the name for a series of children’s horror fiction works written by Robert Lawrence Stine in the 1990s in the US. Among many such works from the American author, this particular series happened to be the most popular. There were also various spin-off series which emerged out of these works. These stories had the characteristic of being funny along with being scary. A television series was also brought to the fans based on the stories. Even though an attempt was made to create a movie on Goosebumps in the year 1998, it didn’t happen. After many speculations by the fans, on 16th of October 2015, the idea was finally brought to the audience in the form of a movie.

Zachary Cooper (Dylan Minnette) has moved from New York to the small fictional town of Madison with his mother Gale Cooper (Amy Ryan). As he begins his schooling there, his mother joins as the vice-principal at the same educational institution. The new place seems to be calm and quiet, and almost everything seems normal except for their neighbours. Even though Zachary quickly becomes close to the friendly neighborhood girl Hannah (Odeya Rush), her father (Jack Black) doesn’t approve of it, and he doesn’t even like anyone else coming near his house. As he tries to keep everyone away, Zachary only wishes to somehow get closer to the neighbours.

Zachary feels that Hannah is being mistreated by her father, and he calls the police. But that doesn’t go on as planned, with the police officers ending up warning him instead. But another day, he breaks into the house with his newly found friend from school, Champion (Ryan Lee) hoping to find her. In there, they find the girl, but it turns out that she and her father are not just normal people like everyone in the town. There is a mystery hidden in the bookshelves and they will end up unlocking them; it surely won’t do the town any good. A new adventure begins with an abominable snowman and a dummy as they unleash something which they can’t seem to stop.

The movie is sure to provide a good dose of nostalgia to those who have grown up reading the books and watching the television series. The impact will still depend on how people consider the way in which this movie shows the creatures related to their childhood memories. The creatures are all good, the most notable ones being Slappy the Dummy, the abominable snowman, the werewolf and the giant praying mantis. The others including the walking dead, vampire bats, ghost-like creatures, vampire-like monsters, the invisible boy, a circus clown and a number of humanoid creatures – all make a nice combination as they come to life from the books. There is a huge group of them, and fans will surely recognize them better.

Goosebumps is never even close to being scary, and the audience needs to keep that in mind. But it is fun, and the monsters are nice to watch on the big screen in 3D. As a horror comedy, this will prove to a fine watch for family audience. The comedy is good, and there are some memorable funny moments in this one, even though viewers might still ask for more. There is nothing new in the story either, and the movie doesn’t even bring a special sub-plot here. As most of the viewers might have guessed a lot earlier, monsters are all from books written by the author of the original series of books, and these main characters need to team up to get them back into the book before the whole town is ruined and everyone around ends up dead.

Jack Black effortlessly carries this movie as the main character and the only person who is in any manner related to these monsters, and holds the key to getting them back into the books. The audience will find that he blends easily into his character as expected. Dylan Minnette has done good work here in the role which can be categorized into that of the male lead. Ryan Lee has his moments completely on the funny side. Odeya Rush does her job really well, and some might find her somewhat a younger version of Mila Kunis at times. Amy Ryan and Jillian Bell manage to contribute well with the next two significant roles. R.L. Stine, the author of the works, also makes a very small cameo appearance as the movie gets near the end.

Even though people should find Goosebumps very much enjoyable, it does remind us of so many movies from the past. Inkheart had the characters from a book coming to life, while The Cabin in the Woods was a movie which had all the popular horror characters coming together as part of a huge, secret plan. Jumanji had the dangers of the board game coming to life to haunt the players, and Zathura dealt with a similar premise. So, the audience won’t find anything new in these creatures coming to life. But they will surely find Goosebumps to be a nice and interesting because of the way in which it is presented, with nostalgia also having a role to play for a few fans.

Release date: 30th October 2015 (India); 16th October 2015 (USA)
Running time: 103 minutes
Directed by: Rob Letterman
Starring: Jack Black, Odeya Rush, Dylan Minnette, Amy Ryan, Ryan Lee, Jillian Bell, Halston Sage, Ken Marino, Steven Krueger, E. Roger Mitchell, Timothy Simons, Amanda Lund, Keith Arthur Bolden, Benjamin Papac, R.L. Stine