Masters of the Universe

Posted on July 23, 2026 by Dr. Tennyson

Vampire Owl: Aren’t we the true masters of the universe?

Vampire Bat: I do not think that they are talking about the vampire universe.

Vampire Owl: Every universe requires its own masters.

Vampire Bat: We already have Uncle Dracula here.

Vampire Owl: Yes, even Vampire Elders are there, but they are all symbolic heads.

Vampire Bat: So, you consider us as the true masters.

Vampire Owl: Well, this is the only working universe, isn’t it?

Vampire Bat: The only true universe with relevance, yes.

Vampire Owl: And the only realm without the pure human evil.

Vampire Bat: The human evil has already reached our borders. There is not much of magic left that seems to stop it.

[Gets a thattu dosa and three cups of Munnar tea].

What is the movie about? :: Adam (Nicholas Galitzine) works in human resources, while keeping on searching for a certain sword and lives with his only friend Hussein (Christian Vunipola) in Oklahoma City. People think that him keeping on searching for a sword and telling everyone a specific story about his escape from another planet are parts of his nerd madness which he always had since he was a kid. The search for the sword would affect both his work and social life, as he even tells the same story when on a date. Obsessed with finding the sword due to his memories about being part of another strange world in which he lived as the prince and had come to Earth with a magic sword, Adam receives an anonymous tip in the form of a text message that the sword is located and he reclaims it at a comic store, running away with it. But the next day, he is arrested for stealing the sword, but the police car is stopped in transit on the highway when a strange creature attacks them and halts the traffic. The ape-like creature turns out to be Beast Man (Gary Martin) who had come from another world and chases Adam.

So, what happens with the events here as we just keep looking? :: As Adam keeps running, a woman in white comes to the scene, identifying herself as his childhood friend, Teela (Camila Mendes). She tells him that the sword had given her a signal when it was claimed and raised to the sky, seemingly provided the same signal to many others of their planet far away. In this planet named Eternia which was once ruled by Adam’s parents King Randor (James Purefoy) and Queen Marlena (Charlotte Riley), no longer maintains that peace and prosperity after being taken over by Skeletor (Jared Leto), his sidekick Evil-Lyn (Alison Brie) and a number of other evil minions. This loss after being defeated by a cyborg and weapons expert of Skeletor, Trap Jaw (Sam C Wilson) had also left the commander-in-chief of the army of Eterna, Man-At-Arms a.k.a. Duncan (Idris Elba) to severe depression and alcoholism, much to the dismay of his daughter Teela. After training so many people of the planet to defend the evil forces, he along with many others had fallen into disarray after Skeletor took over and unleashed chaos.

And what more can happen in this world of chaos and destruction unleashed by forces of evil? :: It was the Sorceress (Morena Baccarin) who sent Adam to Earth to save him and the sword from Skeletor, and as it was the original home planet of the queen a long distance away from Eternia, safety was guaranteed, but as a child, he had lost the sword only to be found now, triggering alarms all around the universe. Adam and Teela manage to outrun the Beast Man and escape in their spaceship in front of shocked humans who could do nothing but stare. Back home, the resistance forces against Skeletor who are not imprisoned by Teela leaving her defence outpost and bringing a strange man with the sword, imprisons her and Adam along with an alcoholic Duncan and a former combat robot reprogrammed as a cleaning robot, Roboto (Kristen Wiig). But they escape with the help of the robot and keeps the sword with them while the defenders of the resistance are either killed or captured by Skeletor’s forces. As they try to escape them and come face to face against Trap Jaw, it seems to be the end for them, but can they find a way to defeat him and his shooters against all odds?

The defence of Masters of the Universe :: The movie has some stunning visuals with the setting in a beautiful planet. The world is too good with the fantasy model buildings and the environment which makes it feel like a colourful paradise. Nicholas Galitzine makes a fine impact as the protagonist, while Idris Elba brings the fun. But the best impact is made by Camila Mendes as Teela, who remains a stunner in those action sequences with her movement and style, as the only one true character who is a born-fighter continuing to be so at all times. Jared Leto as Skeletor is a villain to remember, and gets the screen-time he missed as the Joker in Suicide Squad. Morena Baccarin who gets back after The Wrecking Crew gets less screen time even as such a significant character. Alison Brie as Evil-Lyn works nicely too as one never sees any evil this cute and strong in magic. The humour in the movie also remains so much fun, and the elements taken from cartoon are nicely placed here without too much darkness ever coming into picture. Adora a.k.a. She-Ra played by Lauren Saliu shown during mid-credits also keeps us interested as the one scene itself seems to bring lot of hope for a possible sequel about which we are still not that sure.

Positives and negatives :: This is a feeling of nostalgia, and as we had the cartoon of the same name running in Malayalam in this part of the world, there is no other superhero who had this much of an influence on us as children. We had to return home early from school and then we would successfully watch this one. In the case of the movie, people might find that this is a little bit too cartoonish and as more for the children, but those would be the people who forgot how they grew up watching this, and if Avengers, Justice League and team could be taken as full action, this could be too. The supporting characters here could have had some more time, while cutting some time from the moments spent on Earth. The final fight is lovely to watch, even though the moments back on Earth coming in between do not impress much. The quality of the computer-generated imagery losses some quality at times, but remains stable and stylish for most of the time. Use of more magic could have made the world look more charming, and even more shown as part of an exploration like in Avatar, as the design here never far behind.

How it finishes :: The lack of some seriousness might be the reason why it had the same effect as John Carter at the box-office, but one cannot forget the fact that it was one fine movie, and one of the best of that year. We can blame the strange movie-watching habits of the biggest markets of the movie which did not even make Pacific Rim a super-hit, but Asia serves that title well. All these movies surely did well in this part of the world, and one keeps wondering if a better trailer could have meant better result for the movie at the box-office. I would surely love to see its sequel with the lady superhero, but one has to wonder if the same would happen when the total collection is considered. But this is sure to do well on Amazon Prime Video, and that should also mean something to everyone. For now, this is a charming adventure and entertainer which does not have a dull moment once the scenes shift to the far away planet. The beautiful spectacle of a world with a classic adventure with battles to remember is not something that we can always see with this much charm. People can find cartoon-faults, but I find this to be something I should have watched on the big screen with all of its big screen splendour.

Release date: 5 June 2026
Running time: 140 minutes
Directed by: Travis Knight
Starring: Nicholas Galitzine, Camila Mendes, Alison Brie, James Purefoy, Morena Baccarin, Jóhannes Haukur Jóhannesson, Kristen Wiig, Jared Leto, Idris Elba

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@ Cemetery Watch
✠ The Vampire Bat.

John Carter

Posted on June 6, 2013 by Dr. Tennyson

The story goes an year back, when I felt the horrible lack of respect to one movie which was better than another movie which was released in 2009. This better movie was John Carter and the inferior movie was Avatar. Even as the box office results and the critics say the other way around, the truth is not to be hidden. John Carter is superior to Avatar in each and every aspect, and unfortunately, the brainwashed audience go for movies reading the biased reviews of the so called critics. Well, how many times do someone have to tell these movie fans who read the fake paid reviews and look forward to to the hype, to listen to themselves and the less-hyped movies? For the same reason, I shall give this movie a little more in its ratings, for what it lost in its box office collection and the critical reviews. Seriously, why Avatar? What has it done other than building on the Pocahontas story and even becoming incredibly similar in theme to the Malayalam movie Vietnam Colony? Didn’t Avatar also get enough from this movie’s original story, A Princess of Mars, the science fantasy novel by Edgar Rice Burroughs? Still, it is hailed as the epic and became the highest-grossing film of all time, as well as of the United States and Canada; it is such a shame that there are two ways of treating the same material, the inferior one getting all the applause.

John Carter is more original than Avatar, being the right adaptation of Edgar Rice Burroughs’ 1917 novel, A Princess of Mars. It works as a perfect interplanetary adventure rather than a predictable world where one of the attackers get a candle lit in their brains and decide to get on the side of the helpless defenders. It has a dry and rather dark environment compared to Avatar which works very positively. Even the story is set in a more admirable world, with teleportation being the method rather than those giant space ships which repeats themselves in each and every movie, as the number of science fiction movies featuring space ships and the end of the Earth has reached a new record, as if they are too much interested in ending the Earth with that Voluntary Retirement Scheme which features the world’s most interesting voids which keeps creating more of themselves and call it science fiction, when they are actually confused what kind of creation they have actually given to the viewers. One has to wonder how much satisfaction they get by creating the same thing again and again.

After the sudden and unexpected death of John Carter (Taylor Kitsch), his nephew Edgar Rice Burroughs (Daryl Sabara), attends the funeral. As per Carter’s instructions, the body is put in a tomb that can be unlocked only from the inside, and Burroughs is left with his journal to read and know more about what has happened. It tells his epic story when he is accidently transported to what seems to be a dying planet, Barsoom, a name which is used by inhabitants for what is known to Earthlings as Mars – with a harsh desert environment deprived of vegetation and even water on most of the areas. Because of his variable bone density and the planet’s low gravity, Carter is able to jump very high. But he is captured by a group of Green Martian creatures, called the Tharks and their leader Tars Tarkas (Willem Dafoe). Meanwhile, the princess of the city of Helium, Dejah Thoris (Lynn Collins) escapes from a possible marriage to Sab Than (Dominic West), the leader of the city of Zodanga who is armed with a special weapon obtained from the Therns, the creatures who take the role of the gods of Mars and control the world through manipulation.

After Carter and Dejah unite in the Thark camp, they escape with the leader’s daughter, Sola (Samantha Morton) after being sentenced to death for entering their sacred temple. They decide to get to the end of a river sacred to the Martians in an attempt to find a way for Carter to get back to Earth. Instead they obtain information about the ninth ray, a source of poweful, infinite energy which only the Therns can use to their advantage in a variety of ways, the same thing which they used to strengthen Sab Than, so that Helium would be taken over and may be even destroyed, as Dejah herself was so close to unlocking its secrets; something which would have threatened their own existence as gods, knowing, controlling and manipulating everything on Mars. But before they realize anything else, But they are attacked by the Tharks who are manipulated by the Therns. After Helium troops arrive for help, Dejah agrees to marry Sab Than. So, it is upto the Earthling to save the day, but he is captured by the Thern who tells him how he has manipulated civilizations around the world for centuries in what he calls restoring balance in the world is theirs to control. This leaves Carter with more to deal with other than just a cruel, mindless ruler.

He was very good as Remy LeBeau a.k.a Gambit in X-Men Origins: Wolverine, but this one is undoubtedly his best role ever. It is with amazing skill that he has changed from the former soldier to the defender of Mars; from John Carter of Earth to John Carter of Mars, from John Carter of Virginia to John Carter of Helium, from just a cavalryman on Earth to the saviour, redeemeer, hero and the prince on Mars. Adding Daryl Sabara as Edgar Rice Burroughs seemed like another brilliant idea which helped the movie to become a complete whole, both as a film and a literary adaptation. Lynn Collins looks incredible, outdoing the Kayla Silverfox of X-Men Origins: Wolverine; the two has united for good in this movie, it seems. If there is any doubt if she isn’t a princess of Mars, that would be a clear case of blasphemy in its purest form as long as all the concepts of a princess are concerned. She looked so immersed in that character, and if someone says there is no Helium nor Barsoom, she would be surprised. Strong in will and strong in combat, and surely not trailing in beauty to any other soul around her. It is good to see James Purefoy after watching two of his great movies, Solomon Kane and Ironclad, even as it is in a minor role.

John Carter has the advantage over Avatar in its pacing and characterization, and its environment, even if not too bright and heavy with so much unwanted elements of nature, gives a good effect on the screen – it looks real, unlike the all-time box office topper. Just like a university topper, college topper or class topper is not the best or not even near the best, Avatar can bow down to this movie in that alternate reality which would never come to existence in this world. Well, people are slowly coming to know about this one and how awesome it is, and thus John Carter will be hailed much later at least by a few sensible people. The lack of mechanized warfare, and the absence of blue people can be added as that advantage, but still there are the green ones who live a similar subaltern life as the human-like creatures fight each other and cause collateral damage. If we look closely, it is the species looking closer to humans that are always causing trouble – not really a thing to be proud about, I guess.

John Carter is actually a movie of a revolutionary in many ways – and that man is Carter himself who fights for the people to whom he doesn’t belong, the land to which he is not part of, and brings justice and equality not only to the human-like Martians, but also the oppressed subaltern in the form Tharks. The enslavement by the Therns will be also almost over with his success. He is that Earthling who changes a world for good, thus becoming a man of the cause. If there is any story that can inspire one, this is it. With that ending which the movie has got, there is no reason why one wouldn’t watch it on Star Movies, every time it makes an entrance. On a parallel Earth, this would have been a grand success, but in this world of prejudice and the love for nonsense movies, one has to ask an impaled dead body for truth and the right facts about a movie; for there is not much that one can gain by reading the reviews – never to believe what is written out there, as they misguide you and lead you to the wrong movie, which is why every movie missed is a grand tragedy!

Release date: 9th March 2012
Running time: 132 minutes
Directed by: Andrew Stanton
Starring: Taylor Kitsch, Lynn Collins, Samantha Morton, Mark Strong, Ciarán Hinds, Dominic West, James Purefoy, Willem Dafoe, Daryl Sabara, James Purefoy, Thomas Haden Church