Spider-Man: Homecoming

Vampire Owl: Do they mean to say that Spider-Man will finally come home?

Vampire Bat: I don’t see why not. Home should be where the heart is, and we know how much that it makes everything changing.

Vampire Owl: Well, it doesn’t matter if he come home or not, as there are so many superheroes who have overtaken him in the recent past.

Vampire Bat: Yes, I remember him having ruled the superhero world around here. Superman, Batman and Spider-Man were three big heroes.

Vampire Owl: You see how well Thor: Ragnarok managed to do better than this one at the theatres.

Vampire Bat: It is not really that strange. The Spider-Man that everyone loved, was not this teenager who is more irritating than an undead zombie filling a bucket with a hole.

Vampire Owl: Yes, I remember how irritating he was in Captain America: Civil War.

Vampire Bat: Then, he is also at a low level of heroism compared to almost everyone in the Avengers list.

Vampire Owl: Yes, I am sure that he is too much dependent on Iron Man. And he is like our first known superhero. It is such a shame.

Vampire Bat: At least, he is named after the spider and not the bat.

[Gets three cups of masala tea with Nice Time biscuits].

What is the movie about? :: Adrian Toomes (Michael Keaton)and his salvage company take the contract to clean up the city after the events of The Avengers, but their operation is taken over by the Department of Damage Control (DODC), a combined venture of Tony Stark a.k.a. Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr) and the United States government, much to their dismay as they had set everything for these operations. Now out of business, and left with not many options to come back to track, Adrian and his team keep the Chitauri alien technology they had already managed to take from the site, and use it to create and sell advanced weapons. At the same time, the incidents of Avengers: Age of Ultron also happen, and there is Peter Parker a.k.a. Spider-Man (Tom Holland) who gets invited to all the action during Captain America: Civil War – he is very much excited about the same, but has to get back to Midtown School of Science and Technology to continue his studies.

So, what happens next in the movie? :: Peter used to be part of United States Academic Decathlon, but now, he spends more time looking for action, keeping on checking with Stark’s employee Happy (Jon Favreau) to see if there is chance for any more of the Avengers missions, but he doesn’t reply to the same. His best friend is Ned Leeds (Jacob Batalon) who supports him in all things, and is the only one in college, and the only person among his friends and family to know his secret identity. His classmate and opponent Eugene Flash Thompson (Tony Revolori) wastes no time in making fun of the two, and also his talks about doing internship at Stark Enterprises. Peter doesn’t care though, as he has fallen for a senior girl named Liz Allan (Laura Harrier), and has a few friendly neighbourhood Spidey jobs to do almost every day. He helps people in need using the costume which Tony Stark had provided for him during the battle against Team Captain America.

And what is to follow next in this adventure? :: After stopping criminals from robbing an ATM using the advanced alien weapons, he comes across a deal, and is taken away by Adrian in his Vulture form and dropped in a lake, only to be saved an Iron Man armour programmed to keep track of the Spider-Man suit. But it is not just Vulture that stands in Spider-Man’s way, as the Shocker (Bokeem Woodbine) has also been unleashed. Peter realizes that something huge is going on, and that it is in Maryland as shown by the tracker he set on one of the villains – this leads to Parker rejoining the decathlon team and traveling with them to Washington DC for their national tournament, but with villains with alien technology, one has to wonder if this is too much for a friendly neighbourhood spider-boy to handle – but you can never predict that well as far as our superheroes are concerned; for Ant-Man is the smallest big one!

The defence of Spider-Man: Homecoming :: There are those usual Spider-Man action here again, and it works most of the time. Tom Holland as Spider-Man seems to get into things very well. Earlier, in Captain America: Civil War, Spidey was one irritating creature, and now things have managed to be better. The beginning with his own shots of the adventure with Avengers is pretty bad too, but the villain and his superior ideology to Peter and Tony is a boost, as we have a better antagonist than those in those usual superhero movies. It is nice to have Spider-Man there though, as what could Marvel Cinematic Universe be, without its greatest superhero of all-time? There is a certain funny side that works at times, but not throughout the flick – also, the movie does keep us guessing about what is to happen next, with a clueless superhero gets into his job. The one heroine whom we might be looking for in a sequel, should be Zendaya as Michelle Jones. Before we get things to be better, lets go through the Spidey stuff for its third series of movies.

The claws of flaw :: Everything in this movie seems to happen for one reason or the other, and Spider-Man has to prove himself to the one rich egoistic superhero just because he has money to spend on everything. This does make one wonder if Vulture is the real hero who takes these away from the millionaires and gives it to the people. Even Marisa Tomei seems to have been chosen for Iron Man, as you notice how quickly the age of the aunties of Spider-Man are falling – the first franchise of the century had the actress playing this role in her eighties, then the next one close to her seventies, and in this third group of movies, we will have fifty-year old aunty! Even the leading actress is pretty much not interesting, with her character being there for what seems to be ready to bring that twist about falling in love with the villain’s daughter – it is such an old thing, even for Bollywood; there is the need to change it. Well, the two are poles apart in everything on screen. The action and the tale are not much smarter either.

How it finishes :: Most of us who have grown up reading and watching Spider-Man more than any other superhero will find it strange to have this kind of an irresponsible hero in the Spider-Man suit. The Spider-Man we knew as the supreme one from Marvel, the other two big names Batman and Superman being part of DC, has been brought to be part of a second grade list here, under Iron Man, Captain America, Thor, Hulk, Hawkeye, Black Widow, Vision, Scarlet Witch, Ant-Man, Black Panther, all of whom we who are here at this part of the world never really knew during our childhood. He-Man had a position far above these people, and even our own inspired creation in the form of Shaktimaan. Now, when we see Spider-Man in this form, it makes us wonder more than anything else, and the box-office of this superhero here which is just under Thor: Ragnarok is more because of the left-overs of the Spider-Man of early 2000s, and The Amazing Spider-Man and its sequel, more than the result of Marvel’s new cinematic universe.

Release date: 7th July 2017
Running time: 133 minutes
Directed by: Jon Watts
Starring: Tom Holland, Zendaya, Laura Harrier, Marisa Tomei, Michael Keaton, Robert Downey Jr, Jon Favreau, Donald Glover, Tyne Daly, Gwyneth Paltrow, Jacob Batalon, Isabella Amara, Angourie Rice, Tony Revolori, Garcelle Beauvais, Kerry Condon, Michael Mando, Hemky Madera, Bokeem Woodbine, Logan Marshall-Green, Kenneth Choi, Hannibal Buress, Martin Starr, Jorge Lendeborg Jr, Abraham Attah, Tiffany Espensen, Selenis Leyva, Tunde Adebimpe, Michael Barbieri, Ethan Dizon, Martha Kelly

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@ Cemetery Watch
✠ The Vampire Bat.

The Secret Life of Pets

Vampire Owl: I told you that they had secrets, very dangerous ones.

Vampire Bat: Who are you talking about here?

Vampire Owl: The pets. The minions. The zombies. They all have such secret lives.

Vampire Bat: Actually, this movie is not about your theory of animals stealing your writings. It never really happened, and is just a vampire conspiracy theory.

Vampire Owl: What? No! I know that they are having evil plans against us.

Vampire Bat: How can you look forward to big evil plans in an animated movie?

Vampire Owl: Animated evil is still evil, and it can also be brutal.

Vampire Bat: This one even won 2017 Kids’ Choice Awards.

Vampire Owl: Then I will look for the same in another evil animated movie.

Vampire Bat: Okay, just leave this one as a simple animated movie for now.

[Gets three cups of masala tea with a blueberry cake piece].

What is the movie about? :: A Jack Russell Terrier named Max (Louis CK) is living happily with his owner Katie (Ellie Kemper) in an apartment in the city. He wishes to spend most of his time with her, but she has to go to work. After Katie leaves, he spends his time with other pets who also live in the same building: a fat, apathetic and proud cat Chloe (Lake Bell), a smart and always excited pug Mel (Bobby Moynihan), a happy and easy-going dachshund Buddy (Hannibal Buress), and also a parrot Sweetpea. There are also other two significant pets, Norman (Chris Renaud), a guinea pig who keeps losing his way in the apartment, and Gidget (Jenny Slate), a white Pomeranian dog on the opposite apartment having a desperate crush on Max, but haven’t been able to tell him that due to fear of rejection. All the pets socialise and lead a different life after their owners leave.

So, what happens next? :: As things go like this without anything new or special happening with their lives, Katie adopts Duke (Eric Stonestreet), a large mongrel from the dog pound. This leaves Max jealous about having to share his house and also his belongings with someone new. Despite Duke’s repeated attempts to make a deal to share things, Max doesn’t agree and claims everything for himself. He even attempts to make Max look bad in front of Katie even though she has decided to share her love between the two. Angry at Max’s attitude towards him, Duke tries to teach him a lesson outside, but they are both a group of stray cats who remove their collars and leave them on the streets to be caught by Animal Control. Max is desperate to get home again, while Duke is afraid that he will be put down if he goes back to the dog pound.

And then how do things go from there? :: But things don’t end there for them as help is on the way. There is Snowball (Kevin Hart), a white rabbit who leads a rebel group of pets who were mistreated and disowned by their owners. Max and Duke are saved, and they go with anti-domestication gang into the sewers, hoping to find their way back home one day. There are tales of cruelty from humans against the pets told by the members of the group, and hatred runs wild against the human species. As Max and Duke also pretend to hate humans, and even claim to have killed one, Snowball invites them to join the group. But their earlier enemies, the stray cats come in and tell the truth, and they escape, but not without Snowball on their trail vowing to kill them as they had ended up accidentally killing their holy viper. So, the question remains if they can save themselves, or even their old friends find them and save them before Snowball gets his hands on them?

The defence of The Secret Life of Pets :: The movie nicely takes on the other world, leading us through the imaginary space that our pets consider theirs. The voice cast is very much suitable, and there is lot of fun in store in this one. The kids are going to love this one, as already proven with Kids’ Choice Awards, and the people with pets will love it even more. This will appeal the most to the owners of dogs, but the rest also gets their due. There is the message of adjusting to the situations and also to consider the feelings of others, keeping family and friends close to each other. It also tells the owners of animals and birds to be nice to them, and to keep them close and provide the needed, as they are required to be. Well, we get to associate with more pets than we think we will have to; and The Secret Life of Pets will come into the mind more than once. The whole thing remain cute, even with the talks of murdering others.

The claws of flaw :: There are times when The Secret Life of Pets gives that feeling that we have known and seen this before; there are also moments of predictability and repetition, something that the animated movies have struggled so hard to avoid. There will no new level of animated awesomeness to be set here, and this one surely trails in front of the two big animated movies of the year, Moana and Zootopia or the earlier big one, Inside Out. The movie also focuses on the dog’s side, and it is no surprise with the number of people who have or feel the need to have the dog rather than any other. But a tale about pets like this one could have had more of the cats, and hopefully the sequel will have the same. It is a need, and with this stereotyping that has been going on and on with cats and dogs, maybe there will be a day on which all these things will turn the other way around – it is that day which will have the best of movies of this kind, and we hope that it is The Secret Life of Pets 2 that we can talk about like that.

How it finishes :: With the sequel coming up in the year 2019, what the makers need to realise is that a movie like The Secret Life of Pets doesn’t need to focus that much on making people laugh, because it is funny – maybe some divergence is what the second movie of this series should be having. There is no doubt about the box-office too with this one becoming the highest grossing original animated movie which is not produced by Disney or Pixar, and The Secret Life of Pets is also the the sixth highest grossing film of 2016. It is even above the much hyped movies like Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, Deadpool, Suicide Squad and Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. So, the first movie is a winner in so many ways, and what we will need to have is something different and special in the second one, thus maybe even going on to win the Academy Awards for the Best Animated Feature Film – even that much can be done with this material.

Release date: 8th July 2016
Running time: 87 minutes
Directed by: Chris Renaud
Starring: Louis CK, Eric Stonestreet, Kevin Hart, Jenny Slate, Ellie Kemper, Lake Bell, Dana Carvey, Hannibal Buress, Bobby Moynihan, Steve Coogan, Albert Brooks, Chris Renaud, Michael Beattie, Sandra Echeverría, Kiely Renaud

@ Cemetery Watch
✠ The Vampire Bat.